There are some things in life I've always just known. I've always wanted to be a mom, I've always wanted to be a wife, I've always loved history, and I've always known I'd breastfeed my babies if it was physically possible. I'm so thankful I haven't had any issues with the last one and even made it completely sans formula till Aidan was 6 mos old. I've always said my goal was to nurse until he was 1 yr (the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation), but lately it seems biology is taking over and nursing isnt as easy as it was a few months ago. Its totally fine because Aidan loves to eat and we're rapidly moving into cut up fruit, pancakes, cheerios etc. And I'm proud we've made it this far, yet I'm experiencing this profound sadness about the rapidly approaching end of nursing.
I promise I have no desire to be the lady who nurses her 4 yr old and I'm soooo looking forward to having my boobs shrink down a little so my shirts actually button again. Oh, and have I mentioned Aidan has teeth. Um. yeah.
Still, despite all of this part of me is a little sad. I know its crazy, but I was a little sad when his umbilical cord fell off, (dont worry, i threw it right out...no keeping that stuff!) but it was the last reminder of us being physically connected and now when he doesnt nurse I have this (totally irrational) fear of him not needing me specifically to take care of him. Oh well... anyone else have similar thoughts?
1 comment:
I totally cried the last time Lydia nursed. We cut out our last "feeding" when she was like 10 months--it was really just a "let mommy and daddy stay in bed 20 minutes longer" feeding, but I missed it.
I did not, however, miss the boobs, or the concrete feeling boobs, or the leaking. Nope.
But I definitely still miss having that irreplaceable closeness that nursing creates because no one else can do that for your child.
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