This time of year usually feel a little bipolar...I love love love Christmas, the traditions, the food, the snuggly, sitting by the fire, heart full of love feelings I get when I think back to my childhood Christmases, but I also have this sad, depressed feeling around the holidays too. As intense as my joy is, my sadness at the knowlege of what other people, especially children, will not have is just as intense. I make sure to participate in the food drives and angel trees, but my heart breaks each year at Christmas as the weather turns colder and I know there are kids all over the world who have so much less, who need so much more, and I feel helpless to make a difference. If left to my own devises, I'm afraid we'd have a house full of abanonded kids and animails.
The last few years this has only intensified as I've watched my own child grow. I see how small and innocent and completely dependent he is upon his daddy and I. I am also plagued by the feeling that we aren't doing enough to make a change, but will it ever be enough?
This isnt uplifting or fun, but its been rolling around in my head for awhile now and I'm just not sure what to do with it.
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